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If you were that happy, you wouldn’t be reading this and you wouldn’t be breaking up. Have you ever felt like you were having déjà vu in your dreams?Many BR readers have been or are in an affair situation and wonder, I hope that these fifteen tips can help to put any woman who is in this situation on the road to feeling happier, secure, and free to move on to healthier relationships.Before you go down the breakup route, do have an honest conversation with you and ask: Is this a halfhearted cry for attention from him that I hope will force his hand into making the decision to be with me? This is how you lose credibility and open you up to more pain.There’s the sense of rejection, loss, and even abandonment that can be activated by an affair.It can feel like an exorcism that brings up every ugly thought and issue that you may have been unaware was rumbling around inside you.Failing that, tell a professional or even that coworker who has gently taken an interest in you or expressed concern. This protects you from knee-jerking into another situation that you may not recognise as being unsuitable and unavailable due to craving some sort of emotional replacement – there is no progress in ditching a married man for another emotionally unavailable man. Exploring the reasons that contributed to your desire to be in this relationship will also ensure that you ‘re able to gain a fresh perspective, heal and move forward.

If you’re serious, here are some suggestions for making an exit that focuses on self-care. Whatever story he has told you about why he’s with both of you, the cold hard truth is that he has chosen not to leave because having the best of both worlds is what he chooses. Blaming her for his infidelity and blaming you for why he hasn’t left ignores the bigger picture of the real issues. I know that I never saw myself as a sideline woman, no matter how low my self-esteem was. This is a good time to think about your short-, medium- and long-term goals, as well as your values. If you can afford it, go away for a few days or a week to somewhere nice or go and stay with friends and family. Stop being where he expects you to be and break whatever routine you have. There is someone in your life who can and will be empathetic and support you with your exit.

Many people find reoccurring dreams disturbing, if only for the fact that they seem to be stuck on repeat. And if you have a sense that your reoccurring dream is meaningful, you’re right…

Dreams in general provide valuable insights about your life.

So, take a stroll down memory lane to remember all of our past Word of the Year selections.

When you’re The Other Woman, it’s a rollercoaster of highs and lows and at some point, you should and probably will become sick of being in the situation and will want to break off the affair.

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